Monday, November 14, 2011

Wifey Stuff

Hey guys (more than likely mainly gals)...
I'm writing tonight in an overwhelmed state of mind of failure.
And it's only just begun.
So maybe it's "future failure".
I technically haven't even gotten an opportunity to fail yet really.
No, there hasn't been any blow out fights, sleeping on the couch, or pancakes being thrown across the kitchen...
It's been a week and a half of AWESOMENESS.
I love waking up next to, coming home to, preparing lunches for, watching TV side by side, setting up our new little Christmas tree together, etc etc.
It's just this looming feeling from the devil internally and mentally that I'll be a 'sucky' wife. 
It's like he's said, "Now that you have your vows said and done, you're MINE, and I'm going to weasel my way in and make you like the rest..."
Everything in this world supports that.

I want to be super wife. One that can cook, clean, keep things tidy and organized, the house smells like (idk what? something fantastic?), laundry is folded nicely, has time to keep herself attractive (whatever that entails?), encourage her husband, shine the light of Christ, hold great grades, land a steller job to help support our adoption fund, then that leads into being a mother that loves her children with all her heart following her husband and Christ. 
Jeepers creepers. 


Our apartment is a. mess.
Boxes strewn about, clean clothes, dirty clothes, utensils and appliances still in boxes, you name it. We just did laundry, and oh look, there's another basket, (oh the woes), and to be honest that's not any different than when I first learned how to do laundry. It's just double time now. HAHAHA!

In 10 days, I'm still just as bad of a cooker/baker. 
We've been eating Hickory Park reception left overs since that night, I open our fridge and the HP 'smoked BBQ' smell engulfs me....HA! 
(Give or take the cereal for breakfast of course. :)  wait, NO, I made a chicken casserole in the microwave the Monday after our wedding for supper. YUM.)
I'm not nieve in thinking this would all be conquered in 10 days of happily ever after, but its been 10 days and it's sinking in that this is a spiritual battle of security of who I am in Christ as an individual and now as a wife, someone else's other half and partner in life. I don't want to let my Mr. down or my Heavenly Father who's blessed me with him down.


How do you block the devil out and keep Christ at the very center amongst the busyness and chaos of daily living? I soooo want to start off on the right foot, now that we're back to the reality of the in and outs of the day as husband and wife. But man oh man.
We thankfully received so many great books about being a Godly wife, Godly husband, couples devo books, couples books, a couples Bible, etc for wedding gifts. I've been reading the backs or intros and seriously can NOT- wait to dive into those one by one and together with my husband. I really need to let God lead and Beau lead and lean on Him. 

Because all of these expectations, all of these wants and desires, and the desire to SO BADLY break the mold of 'history' in our families, I need Christ to give me the confidence, encouragement, drive, grace, ans strength to seek HIM and obey HIM and respond and act and speak like He would. 

So, what do you and yours do, to keep Christ at the center from all your years of experience of being a husband-wife duo for the Lord? 
We'll take all the wisdom and advice we can get! 
(on the wife end, husband end, or couple as a whole end)

(this request was a little too in depth to ask guests to leave in the guest book ;) haha)

This post went from droopy to really being encouraged by the Holy Spirit just through's crazy the tricks of the devil that play out on us as believers and as women. Gross. I just want to prove him wrong, the world and societies standards wrong- (to be the best wife possible for my husband) and rejoice and rest in the truth that Christ is VICTORIOUS ALWAYS.

1 Corinthians 15:57
But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.


1 comment:

Mindy said...

A very true look at your life and heart- that's a very good place to start. Then, whoa! Slow down the perfect train! Ease up on the expectations throttle! Your guy didn't marry you just to have you turn into a domestic maniac 10 days later. If it's boxes and HP for a while- and you're no slacker- fine. It's ok. If you can't stand the 'que for one meal more, freeze it. Boxes- stick them in a room and forget 'em for a while.
Marriage is a process. Process. It.takes.a.while. #youwillfail
It's a totally new journey you have to figure out together. Together!! Yay!