dear my sweet little lady m, and my ever so handsome little man,
I'm writing to you as I lay in bed and listen to the summer sounds of "outside" through the window, in my room. (You're out of this world daddy is sawin' logs next to me) Your room, is just a few steps away across the hall. I long for you to be sleeping in those little beds- all made up for you in fun, bright colors. Sometimes I just lay in your bed little Mr. (Trust me, I've thought of crawling in your crib little lady M). I look around at the walls that were painted months ago by your momma, daddy, grandpa, and uncle- for you. Your dad didn't think the walls needed painted. It "already looked brown" he said. But in fact my little ones, they were gross yellowy nastiness. Now, NOW they are tan. There's a difference. ;) I lay there under the covers and just think, dream, and wonder.....
I can't wait to hear your little sighs in your sleep, or check in on you as dad and I go to bed and see what caddywompus angle you're sleeping in, compared to how we tucked you in. There are puzzles waiting to be strewn about the floor and put back together again. There are books upon books ready to be read to you, pages torn (the teacher in mom will try my best to just smile and tape, tape, tape them up!), and giving into "just one more" before bed.
I'm excited for that bathroom down the hall to be occupied by two wee toothbrushes, foam letters stuck to the tub walls, hooded towels in all sorts of different animal shapes, and let's face it- some misfired streams of you-know-what, from what can only come from a male, somewhere around the porcelain throne. ;) Yes. Even that.
I can't waaaaait to go on walks and bike rides to show you this new city. The places your dad and I have been. The place we went on our first date. The townhouse he asked me to be his girlfriend at. The park he asked me to be his forever and always at. The house of worship we said our "I Dos" within. Our favorite restaurants to eat at on date nights.
But mostly, when I lay there, I just pray and pray and pray. (Well, and sob too. But what little boy and little girl wanna know that about their momma!?) I pray for your day, because in the middle of the night when I'm awake...so are you- in the beginning of your day. I pray for you to show kindness to your friends, I pray for your bellies to be full, your little bodies to be healthy. I pray for those amazing and incredible women who take care of you each moment of the day and night. I pray that you'll one day know, trust, obey, and love Jesus. I pray that The Lord would knit our gushy hearts together- a new kind of "forever and always" in my life, and in yours. I pray for the people in your country, your new country, and everyone in between handling this "process" to do so quickly, efficient, and honestly.
I pray when I see you in a short coupe of weeks, that the Almighty God would work MIRACLES in our attaching to one another. I wonder about the first glance I catch of you both. Who will it be first!? Who will I get to wrap my arms around first!? Little Mr, how am I going to get in those bashful and shy ways of yours, so you know just how much I love you? Oh and sweet little lady....oh my can I not wait to smooch. those. cheekies.
Father, what are you going to do in those days!? In the days after I'm back home? The days that Lord willing, they are home, in this home. In the room across the hall?
I can't wait.
I love you C. I love you M. I love you Lord.